Latest items:
steve, 20 august 2020
Why Is It
"Why is it".. that you make me feel what I haven't felt in years...
And why every time I see you do my eyes just fill with tears,
Why do I have to touch myself every time you walk away...
As the flames inside consume me all I want is you to stay,
I've tried to reach inside you to somehow touch your heart...
But I'm no closer to you now than I was right from the start,
The fortress you have built is strong with walls too high to climb...
But I'd give my life to breach them all and claim your heart as mine,
"Why is it".. that you look away when I look into your eyes...
I can feel the pain inside of you that you desperately disguise,
What hell have you been living that keeps you far away...
That won't let anyone get near and keeps your heart at bey,
Like breachless walls of titanium, there's nothing you've left bare...
So "why is it" I can't let go, when I know you'll never care...
steve, 26 march 2020
"Here and Now"
When I ask to spend some time with you, and I get no reply...
I just want to turn and run, so you won't see me cry,
I know that I am not what you want, but I've got what you need...
So give me half a chance with you, don't make me beg and plead,
I'm not asking to be your boyfriend, I'm not asking for your hand...
I just want to spend some time, and try to understand,
To show you something you've not seen, to go where you've not been...
To pick you up when you fall down, so you can start again,
You know what my heart feels for you, is out of my control...
And everything that's good in me, is reaching for your soul,
Darkness is so lonely when you spend your nights alone...
And the echo's of your yesterdays, are the seeds you have sewn,
No one knows the future, where here and then we're gone...
So let me hold your heart to mine, until the morning dawn,
For I have more to offer than I'm given credit for...
And if you'd just surrender, I could show you so much more,
The future hasn't happened yet, and the past is yesterday...
It's "here and now" that matters most, just tell me that you'll stay.
steve, 25 march 2020
"Long Ago"
I used to dream about you, now those are days gone by...
I learned too well the hard way, how you could make me cry,
I can't explain why I'm drawn to you, because I don't even know...
Maybe in another life, I loved you long ago,
When I'd look into your eyes, it'd take my breath away...
And words did not come easy, for things I wished to say,
I'd gaze upon your beauty, and the world would disappear...
While life goes on around me, it's only you, I'd hear,
I wanted just to love you, the only way I know...
Like a dream the haunts me every night, from a life of long ago,
I thought I knew what love is, but I've never felt such pain...
Tear my heart out of my chest, then do it all again,
I know that you will never care, I know that I'm alone...
I know that you will break my heart because your's is made of stone,
And though the storm is coming, I still want to try...
Because it's easier to say "I love you"... then it is to say "goodbye".
steve, 7 january 2020
"I Am Not"
Please forgive me Father.. for the man "I am not"...
As the sin in me is stronger.. then the love I never got,
I thought I'd follow my heart.. but it just led me astray...
So far away from you... I've forgotten how to pray,
Forgive me for believing... I could make it on my own...
I never meant to leave you.. or lose my way back home,
Forgive me for my weakness.. that keeps me lost in sin...
Thank you for the love you give.. that brings me back again,
Without you there is nothing.. and hope could never live...
Life would have no meaning.. without the love you give,
Forgive me for the love I feel.. that keeps my heart in chains...
Help me, Father, do your will... there's so much more to gain,
Give me your strength when I am weak.. your love when I have none..
Bring me home to be with you.. the Father and the Son.
steve, 29 june 2019
"Don't Look Back"
I never want to hear your name.. it reminds me of what we had...
And I don't want to feel that pain.. for nothing hurts so bad,
I have to pick up the pieces.. and just keep on moving on...
And "don't look back".. no matter what.. for what we had is gone,
I cannot hear the words you say.. it's just a convient lie...
A way to break my heart again.. as you promise to "really try",
I cannot see your beauty.. real beautys from within...
I've seen what lives inside you.. and I can't go there again,
I don't know how I loved you.. or why I love you still...
Or where the strength to leave you comes... I only know I will,
So save your words.. speak not of love.. and I'll be on my way...
As the dawns begun to light the sky.. and begin a brand new day.
sg
steve, 27 august 2019
"Monsoon"
There's a "monsoon" pouring down... in my heart and in my head...
And I can't stop the rain... from things that have been said,
The torrent that is rushing by... is washing me away...
And the years keep coming faster... leaving only yesterday,
Dreams I used to carry... have turned to nothing more...
Then vessels on the water... never reaching any shore,
The winds of time are blowing strong... but have yet to lift my sails...
And nothing that I've done in life... have ever tipped the scales,
It's like I'm here, but I'm not... and nothing that I do...
Will change a single thing... or make me visible to you,
Sometimes when I think I'm right... everything is wrong...
The years are passing way too fast... but nights are still too long,
If I've learned anything... it's that life's not what you think...
And when it's good... hold on tight... for it passes in a blink,
So let the rains fall down upon me... let it wash all over me...
Let my tears fill the rivers ... that are heading out to sea,
Let the tides rise and wash away.. the pain we hold onto.....
And maybe give us one more chance, at love we once knew.
steve, 27 august 2019
"Man On Fire"
I feel a fire raging.. deep down in my soul...
White hot flames are burning.. and know ones in control,
You can't know just how I feel.. and know one has a clue...
Of the fire raging inside me... when all I want is you,
I wish that I could tell you.. exactly how I feel...
Instead of stepping lightly.. while trying to conceal,
Life is more exciting.. when I look into your eyes...
I can feel every heart beat.. as my blood begins to rise,
Everything inside of me... I'm trying to control...
Like a moth to a flame-... I can feel it in my soul,
I wish that you could look at me... the way you look at her...
So I could feel the passion.. the way we never were,
To know the love inside your heart..or the heat beneath your skin..
There's nothing that I wouldn't do.. that I wouldn't do again,
I know the dreams I have of you.. live only in my head..
And any tears that have to fall.. are tears that I have shed,
I know that you don't understand.. why would you even care...
For you don't know the depth of love.. for you my heart must bear,
And though I cannot say out loud.. my true hearts desire..
You can see me from a hundred miles.. for I'm the "man on fire".
steve, 3 september 2019
"Holding On"
I've been "holding on" for life, for love, for us, for me...
I thought the storm would pass by now, so that we both may see,
But the skies are even darker, than they were the day before...
And the distant sound of thunder, says that soon the rain will pour,
The cold wind stings, and takes its toll, each time that we lash out...
And it's one step back, from where we were, when you live in love and doubt,
The rain pours down upon me, I've been holding on so long...
I thought by now you'd know me, but I've never been so wrong,
The stars once shined above our heads, now it seems like its been years...
And I haven't seen a clear night yet, but it's hard to see through tears,
And I wonder if the chance we had, is all we threw away...
Or just how much, that we have lost, for things we didn't say.
steve, 24 october 2019
"No Words"
Though all you have for me is hate... I'll always care for you...
Because nothing that you said.. made me feel the way you do,
Am I supposed to walk away.. and never say your name...
Never dream of you again.. and pretend there is no pain,
Tell myself to just let go .. you never cared for me...
And put my broken heart away.. that I wore on my sleeve,
Because my whole world got darker.. when you said goodbye...
And though you wouldn't know it .. I'd think of you and cry,
I don't know what I did.. that would turn your heart to stone...
But when you said goodbye to me .. it hurt right to the bone,
Any thoughts of touching you.. have all dissolved away...
And any dreams I had of us.. will never see the day,
So I try hard to not think about.. the last time I saw you...
I don't want to feel your hate.. much less believe it's true,
You took me by complete surprise .. I had "no words" to say...
And I can't fight the one I love .. I had to walk away,
I thought that we were stronger than any play on words...
I thought that we were friends.. but I guess that's been deferred,
It's not easy letting go .. but you know I can't hold on...
If that's the way you really feel.. you're already gone,
I'll just have to face the dark.. the way I always do...
Shed some tears before I sleep.. and wake up without you.
steve, 25 october 2019
"Fly Away"
I guess I should let go... as you want no part of me...
And never get to know the part.. that I will never see,
The part of you I've longed for.. the part I've never known...
The part that's kept behind closed doors... a fortress made of stone,
I know just where I stand .. you can't help the way you feel...
We can't control what's in our heart.. or expect it to be still,
And though my true desire.. runs deeper than the sea...
Sometimes we have to bury pain.. before we can be free,
And I will not forget you... I wouldn't even try...
Does the moon forget the stars.. as they share the evening sky?
I must take my love and "fly away".. while the winds beneath my wings...
But you will always have my heart.. and I'll always have my dreams.
steve, 2 november 2019
"Just Some Friend"
It's hard to even come around .. and pretend I'm "just some friend"...
When I look into those deep blue eyes... I'm drifting on the wind,
Your beauty leaves me breathless.. when you come into view...
I lose all sense of any thoughts.. as all thoughts turn to you...
I try to be like other friends.. but your other friends aren't gay...
And awkward moments when I'm with you.. reveal what I can't say,
I can barely breathe at all.. when I get too close to you...
So forgive me if I can't stay long.. for I can't hide the truth,
The tears rain down inside of me..and the river's overflow...
It's not a truth I want to share... but I've no place else to go,
I feel I'm hanging by a thread.. and no one has a clue...
As I try to hide what I feel, but all I want is you,
I can hear the echoes of laughter... when my back is turned...
I know whats it's like to be sacrificed... when your set on fire and burned,
But such is the cost when your different... for some people love to hate...
I just wanted the chance to feel love again... as the hourglass sand slips away.
steve, 6 november 2019
"Too Late"
I tried to protect my heart.. to keep it away from you...
To never let you get too close... no matter what you do,
I tried to build a wall.. too high for you to climb.
Something that's so ominous.. you wouldn't waste the time,
I thought I'd make no sound.. so you wouldn't know my voice...
We'd never have to look away.. and say we had no choice,
And I tried to leave no trail.. that you might follow me...
I thought if I'm invisible.. there'd be nothing there to see,
But you did touch my heart.. and you didn't even try...
I thought it was safely hidden.. I didn't know you could fly,
You scaled the walls with precision.. walls that no one could climb..
I thought my heart was well hidden.. but was only a matter of time,
I didn't have to say a word.. you knew me all along...
You broke through every defense I had.. when I thought that I was strong,
You took my heart a prisoneer.. and didn't even know...
And left me in a place... I couldn't dream to go,
I never told you how I felt.. before you went away...
I never told you that I cared.. and I care every day,
Now you're gone and it's too late.. to cross that great divide...
Regrets and tears are all I have.. for never having tried.
steve, 9 november 2019
"Morning Light"
If you wake up all alone .. and need someone who cares..
If the weight upon you're shoulders .. becomes too much to bear,
If lonely starts to haunt you.. in the middle of the night..
Or you need someone to hold on to.. who'll hold you just as tight,
If you need someone to talk to.. who would never lie to you..
And won't candy-coat the story.. who stands up for the truth,
If you're tired of the rat race.. and need to get away..
Or need to be taken care of .. if only for a day,
You have but to call me.. and you know that I'll be there..
There's nothing that I wouldn't do.. my soul to you I'd bare,
You're the light in the distance.. that overcomes the dark..
You're the fire that's ignited .. whenever there's a spark,
You're my dream when I'm sleeping.. the answer to a prayer...
I'm the one you can call.. when you think that no one cares,
Just remember that I'm out here.. a lifeline in the night..
Wanting to be with you .. until the "morning light".
steve, 20 august 2020
Passion
There's a passion that burns, between you and I,
Igniting a spark, that could light up the sky,
So hot is the fire, that burns through the night,
It blurs out the difference, of what's wrong or what's right,
All that I wanted, was for love to take hold...
I could feel the fire that burned,
With white-hot emotion, that was out of control...
and flames that wouldn't be turned,
But how is there love, and a passion so strong,
When two minds can't meet and every things wrong,
With no understanding, and nowhere to turn,
Like throwing gas on a fire, stand back let it burn,
When the backfires are lit, there's no turning back...
as another lesson is learned,
But I knew all along, the danger involved...
play with fire, you always get burned,
I did not want to lose us, but it seems I have...
as the flames have burned us down,
And as I walk through the rubble, of what's left of my life...
not a thing is left to be found.
Latest comments:
9 may 2024
Adam Pietras (Barry Kant)
Ech, Eva, miałem pewne przemyślenia związane
9 may 2024
Eva T.
Tak, prosze :)
9 may 2024
jeśli tylko
wycieczka do dachau..
8 may 2024
Weronika
Odwieczny strach przed porankiem.
8 may 2024
kb
też prawda. amnezja ma prawo kiedyś się skończyć
7 may 2024
Zapomnieć żeby było co sobie przypominać.
7 may 2024
Em, nie do końca, może wrzucę jakieś rozwinięcie,
7 may 2024
Myśli się zawsze więcej, niż pisze, tak sądzę.
7 may 2024
Pieknie w tej zieleni. Pozdrawiam :)
7 may 2024
Pomyslalam o wiezowcu, ale jesli o nic nie chodzi...
7 may 2024
Piekny :)
7 may 2024
spisanie to ujawnienie..
10 may 2024
Satish Verma
9 may 2024
wiesiek
8 may 2024
wiesiek
8 may 2024
Satish Verma
7 may 2024
wiesiek
6 may 2024
Satish Verma
5 may 2024
Satish Verma
4 may 2024
kalik
4 may 2024
Satish Verma
3 may 2024
wiesiek