Latest items:
steve, 7 january 2020
"I Am Not"
Please forgive me Father.. for the man "I am not"...
As the sin in me is stronger.. then the love I never got,
I thought I'd follow my heart.. but it just led me astray...
So far away from you... I've forgotten how to pray,
Forgive me for believing... I could make it on my own...
I never meant to leave you.. or lose my way back home,
Forgive me for my weakness.. that keeps me lost in sin...
Thank you for the love you give.. that brings me back again,
Without you there is nothing.. and hope could never live...
Life would have no meaning.. without the love you give,
Forgive me for the love I feel.. that keeps my heart in chains...
Help me, Father, do your will... there's so much more to gain,
Give me your strength when I am weak.. your love when I have none..
Bring me home to be with you.. the Father and the Son.
steve, 9 november 2019
"Morning Light"
If you wake up all alone .. and need someone who cares..
If the weight upon you're shoulders .. becomes too much to bear,
If lonely starts to haunt you.. in the middle of the night..
Or you need someone to hold on to.. who'll hold you just as tight,
If you need someone to talk to.. who would never lie to you..
And won't candy-coat the story.. who stands up for the truth,
If you're tired of the rat race.. and need to get away..
Or need to be taken care of .. if only for a day,
You have but to call me.. and you know that I'll be there..
There's nothing that I wouldn't do.. my soul to you I'd bare,
You're the light in the distance.. that overcomes the dark..
You're the fire that's ignited .. whenever there's a spark,
You're my dream when I'm sleeping.. the answer to a prayer...
I'm the one you can call.. when you think that no one cares,
Just remember that I'm out here.. a lifeline in the night..
Wanting to be with you .. until the "morning light".
steve, 6 november 2019
"Too Late"
I tried to protect my heart.. to keep it away from you...
To never let you get too close... no matter what you do,
I tried to build a wall.. too high for you to climb.
Something that's so ominous.. you wouldn't waste the time,
I thought I'd make no sound.. so you wouldn't know my voice...
We'd never have to look away.. and say we had no choice,
And I tried to leave no trail.. that you might follow me...
I thought if I'm invisible.. there'd be nothing there to see,
But you did touch my heart.. and you didn't even try...
I thought it was safely hidden.. I didn't know you could fly,
You scaled the walls with precision.. walls that no one could climb..
I thought my heart was well hidden.. but was only a matter of time,
I didn't have to say a word.. you knew me all along...
You broke through every defense I had.. when I thought that I was strong,
You took my heart a prisoneer.. and didn't even know...
And left me in a place... I couldn't dream to go,
I never told you how I felt.. before you went away...
I never told you that I cared.. and I care every day,
Now you're gone and it's too late.. to cross that great divide...
Regrets and tears are all I have.. for never having tried.
steve, 2 november 2019
"Just Some Friend"
It's hard to even come around .. and pretend I'm "just some friend"...
When I look into those deep blue eyes... I'm drifting on the wind,
Your beauty leaves me breathless.. when you come into view...
I lose all sense of any thoughts.. as all thoughts turn to you...
I try to be like other friends.. but your other friends aren't gay...
And awkward moments when I'm with you.. reveal what I can't say,
I can barely breathe at all.. when I get too close to you...
So forgive me if I can't stay long.. for I can't hide the truth,
The tears rain down inside of me..and the river's overflow...
It's not a truth I want to share... but I've no place else to go,
I feel I'm hanging by a thread.. and no one has a clue...
As I try to hide what I feel, but all I want is you,
I can hear the echoes of laughter... when my back is turned...
I know whats it's like to be sacrificed... when your set on fire and burned,
But such is the cost when your different... for some people love to hate...
I just wanted the chance to feel love again... as the hourglass sand slips away.
steve, 25 october 2019
"Fly Away"
I guess I should let go... as you want no part of me...
And never get to know the part.. that I will never see,
The part of you I've longed for.. the part I've never known...
The part that's kept behind closed doors... a fortress made of stone,
I know just where I stand .. you can't help the way you feel...
We can't control what's in our heart.. or expect it to be still,
And though my true desire.. runs deeper than the sea...
Sometimes we have to bury pain.. before we can be free,
And I will not forget you... I wouldn't even try...
Does the moon forget the stars.. as they share the evening sky?
I must take my love and "fly away".. while the winds beneath my wings...
But you will always have my heart.. and I'll always have my dreams.
steve, 24 october 2019
"No Words"
Though all you have for me is hate... I'll always care for you...
Because nothing that you said.. made me feel the way you do,
Am I supposed to walk away.. and never say your name...
Never dream of you again.. and pretend there is no pain,
Tell myself to just let go .. you never cared for me...
And put my broken heart away.. that I wore on my sleeve,
Because my whole world got darker.. when you said goodbye...
And though you wouldn't know it .. I'd think of you and cry,
I don't know what I did.. that would turn your heart to stone...
But when you said goodbye to me .. it hurt right to the bone,
Any thoughts of touching you.. have all dissolved away...
And any dreams I had of us.. will never see the day,
So I try hard to not think about.. the last time I saw you...
I don't want to feel your hate.. much less believe it's true,
You took me by complete surprise .. I had "no words" to say...
And I can't fight the one I love .. I had to walk away,
I thought that we were stronger than any play on words...
I thought that we were friends.. but I guess that's been deferred,
It's not easy letting go .. but you know I can't hold on...
If that's the way you really feel.. you're already gone,
I'll just have to face the dark.. the way I always do...
Shed some tears before I sleep.. and wake up without you.
steve, 3 september 2019
"Holding On"
I've been "holding on" for life, for love, for us, for me...
I thought the storm would pass by now, so that we both may see,
But the skies are even darker, than they were the day before...
And the distant sound of thunder, says that soon the rain will pour,
The cold wind stings, and takes its toll, each time that we lash out...
And it's one step back, from where we were, when you live in love and doubt,
The rain pours down upon me, I've been holding on so long...
I thought by now you'd know me, but I've never been so wrong,
The stars once shined above our heads, now it seems like its been years...
And I haven't seen a clear night yet, but it's hard to see through tears,
And I wonder if the chance we had, is all we threw away...
Or just how much, that we have lost, for things we didn't say.
steve, 27 august 2019
"Man On Fire"
I feel a fire raging.. deep down in my soul...
White hot flames are burning.. and know ones in control,
You can't know just how I feel.. and know one has a clue...
Of the fire raging inside me... when all I want is you,
I wish that I could tell you.. exactly how I feel...
Instead of stepping lightly.. while trying to conceal,
Life is more exciting.. when I look into your eyes...
I can feel every heart beat.. as my blood begins to rise,
Everything inside of me... I'm trying to control...
Like a moth to a flame-... I can feel it in my soul,
I wish that you could look at me... the way you look at her...
So I could feel the passion.. the way we never were,
To know the love inside your heart..or the heat beneath your skin..
There's nothing that I wouldn't do.. that I wouldn't do again,
I know the dreams I have of you.. live only in my head..
And any tears that have to fall.. are tears that I have shed,
I know that you don't understand.. why would you even care...
For you don't know the depth of love.. for you my heart must bear,
And though I cannot say out loud.. my true hearts desire..
You can see me from a hundred miles.. for I'm the "man on fire".
steve, 27 august 2019
"Monsoon"
There's a "monsoon" pouring down... in my heart and in my head...
And I can't stop the rain... from things that have been said,
The torrent that is rushing by... is washing me away...
And the years keep coming faster... leaving only yesterday,
Dreams I used to carry... have turned to nothing more...
Then vessels on the water... never reaching any shore,
The winds of time are blowing strong... but have yet to lift my sails...
And nothing that I've done in life... have ever tipped the scales,
It's like I'm here, but I'm not... and nothing that I do...
Will change a single thing... or make me visible to you,
Sometimes when I think I'm right... everything is wrong...
The years are passing way too fast... but nights are still too long,
If I've learned anything... it's that life's not what you think...
And when it's good... hold on tight... for it passes in a blink,
So let the rains fall down upon me... let it wash all over me...
Let my tears fill the rivers ... that are heading out to sea,
Let the tides rise and wash away.. the pain we hold onto.....
And maybe give us one more chance, at love we once knew.
steve, 29 june 2019
"Don't Look Back"
I never want to hear your name.. it reminds me of what we had...
And I don't want to feel that pain.. for nothing hurts so bad,
I have to pick up the pieces.. and just keep on moving on...
And "don't look back".. no matter what.. for what we had is gone,
I cannot hear the words you say.. it's just a convient lie...
A way to break my heart again.. as you promise to "really try",
I cannot see your beauty.. real beautys from within...
I've seen what lives inside you.. and I can't go there again,
I don't know how I loved you.. or why I love you still...
Or where the strength to leave you comes... I only know I will,
So save your words.. speak not of love.. and I'll be on my way...
As the dawns begun to light the sky.. and begin a brand new day.
sg
steve, 29 june 2019
"One True Love"
As I lie here and watch you sleeping.. I can't help but crack a smile...
I feel the peace upon your face.. knowing all the while,
This is where I want to be.. with you always by my side...
Because your the reason I carry on.. my purpose and my pride,
They say that life's a circle.. but mines an uphill shot...
With winding roads.. and pain untold.. and battles yet un-fought,
If your love is my reward.. for the scars that I have earned...
Then I can walk through any fire.. and I cannot be burned,
You are my light.. you are my strength.. your a gift from "God" above...
And if ever there was a "ment to be".. you are my "one true love".
sg
steve, 28 june 2019
"Burn The Bridiges"
The sun is getting lower, as it streaks across the sky...
And the nights keep getting longer, without you by my side,
I don't know just what to do, that would turn it all around...
For everything I thought I knew, has now become unwound,
Your act is so indifferent, I'm not sure just who you are...
I used to think that we were close, but now you seem so far,
Just how is it ok, to hurt the one you love...
To not stand up for what is right, when you should rise above,
To never say you're sorry, or admit that you were wrong...
To let the ones who love you most, suffer all alone,
And what's the price we'll have to pay when the walls come tumbling down...
As you burn the bridges that we build and any love we found,
Is it pride or is it anger, that has a hold on you...
And keeps you bound to fear and hate, in everything you do,
I've been waiting for the light within you, to awaken in your heart...
To bring to life, and back to me, what's been torn apart,
I pray our love is strong enough, and that you'll finally see...
True love can heal anything, and bring back what used to be.
steve, 28 june 2019
"How Do I"
How do I bring you back.. to where we used to be...
To show whats in my heart.. and what you mean to me,
How do I heal the damage.. from angered words we say..
When the only thing that matters.. is wanting you to stay,
How do I give to you.. the love you need so bad...
When I'm not sure just how to give..what I've never had,
How do I say goodbye.. when my heart will not let go...
And the words I speak all fail me.. when my heart I try to show,
How do I live without you.. when without you I can't live...
And to hold you in my arms once more.. this life I'd gladly give.
steve, 28 june 2019
"One Wish"
If I was given just one wish.. to turn my life around...
My wish would be, for you and me.. to keep what we have found,
I've many regrets and sorrows.. and paid too high a cost...
I've laughed.. I've cried.. I've run to hide.. for mistakes, and loved ones lost,
But then you walked into my life..and now the skies are blue...
It seems at last.. the rain has past.. and everything is new,
I feel that "God" has smiled at me.. for enduring all the rain...
And given me someone to love.. someone who'll ease the pain,
If I was given just "one wish"..... to turn my life around...
I'd give it back.. for what I lack.. in you these things I've found.
steve, 25 june 2019
"Perfect Is A Fairytale"
Its when your not around.. that makes me realize...
All the things I tell myself.. are nothing more than lies,
I'll say that I don't need you.. pretending that's it's true...
But when you're gone.. and it's just me.. all I want is you,
I'll tell myself.. don't fall in love.. for love will never last...
But I know too well.. to save my heart.. the time has long since past,
I thought at last.. when I found love.. how perfect it would be...
Everything would fall in place.. and we'd never disagree,
But "perfect is a fairytale".. life is what is real...
Happy.. sad .. content..or mad.. this is what we feel,
I guess I should surrender.. I could never walk away...
For if never there was darkness.. there could never be a day,
I will always love you... and we'll always disagree...
So I will learn to look beyond.. to just the love I see.
steve, 25 june 2019
"Turn And Walk Away"
The sun came up again today.. and though you're still not here...
I can't see a reason why... that I should shed a tear,
But I wipe my eyes.. and I go on.. to face another day...
While the shadows of your memory.. in my head begin to play,
After all the years.. after all the times.. after all that, we've been through...
How could you "turn and walk away"... while I'm still in love with you,
What more to life.. is there than love... though some shall never know...
But I can barely breathe at all.. for my heart will not let go,
What words to say to touch your heart.. and bring you back to me...
To show you all the love we had... and what it still can be,
If just once... I could turn back time.. to the day when we first met...
For one more chance to get it right.. and live without regret.
steve, 25 june 2019
"Two Steps Back"
I've tried so hard to get along.. but all we do is fight...
And the tears I cry may fall like rain... but I'm alone again tonight,
Goodbye would be so easy.. if I wern't in love with you,
One step forward, and two steps back.. have never been so true...
It breaks my heart.. that we found love.. but were going down in flames...
For even love can't save us now.. as we play our little games,
I thought that we could make it.. that love could conquer all...
As I'm hanging on for life.. from this long and lonely fall,
And though my heart is bleeding.. I just can't say goodbye...
My love for you won't let me go.. I think I'd rather die,
Together we could have it all.. why can't I make you see...
That all that you've been searching for.. is here inside of me.
steve, 25 june 2019
"Heaven's On Earth"
My mind wanders.. with thoughts of you.. I'm so grateful for your love...
And just why on earth.. of all the hearts.. its mine you hold above,
I can't think of anything.. to deserve someone like you...
For anything, is what I'd give.. to have you love me too,
I shouldn't tell you.. how I feel.. when I look into your eyes...
Or just how high it takes me.. you chose me of all the guys,
And I won't say, how warm it feels.. to hear you say my name...
Or though we've kissed a thousand times.. its never quite the same,
Or even that my blood still boils.. long after your lingering touch...
While pretending "I don't give a dam".. when your love I need so much,
Should I hide the fact.. that just your kiss.. sets my soul on fire?
And never mention.. the ragging battle.. of my uncontrolled desire,
If I told you how I really felt.. would it change the way you feel?
Would you look at me the way you do.. and say you love me still,
Or do I let the fires burn.. and the chips fall where they may...
For "heaven's on earth".. right here.. with you.. and its where I want to stay.
steve, 25 june 2019
"More Than Just Hello"
The first thing that I noticed.. when I laid eyes on you..
Was your beauty and how it emanates.. in everything you do,
Something "more than just hello".. drew me when we met..
I looked into your chocolate eyes.. and broke into a sweat,
With cinnamon skin so beautiful.. my senses began to spark..
Setting off a fire inside.. that raged well into dark,
I couldn't stop thinking about you.. or get you out of my head..
So I rewound every moment.. and replayed what was said,
I wanted to be with you.. to know just who you are..
To hear the story that you live.. and how you came this far,
Everything about you.. from your head down to your toes..
Was everything I needed.. but I couldn't let you know,
I know that I can't keep you.. and I know that it won't last..
But I'll always have the memories.. to relive a time that's passed.
steve, 30 may 2019
"Times"
Though you'll soon be leaving... I won't let it break my heart...
For there were things between us... that kept us far apart,
I'll cherish what we shared.. when we put those things aside...
And the chasm that's between us... didn't seem so wide,
There were times when I loved you.. and times you made me mad...
But most times I was grateful.. for all the times we had,
And when you fly away... like a bird upon the wind...
I'll keep the memories close to heart.. and always call you friend.
SG
steve, 30 may 2019
"Never Will"
When you walked out last night.. my heart hit the floor..
I've never felt so empty.. as I watched you close the door,
If you could see my heart.. or the river that I've cried..
Then you might understand the pain.. from you that I must hide,
I can't burden your broken heart.. because my hearts broken too..
And I can't look into your eyes.. and say that "I love you",
I know that you don't feel the same.. I know you never will..
But as long as you still have knowone.. use me at your will,
For I'd take any part of you.. I know you'll soon be gone..
But you don't have to be alone.. in the darkness before dawn,
Together is less "lonely".. and together we are strong..
I just want to kill the pain.. thats been hurting for so long,
You don't have to promise me.. a thing before you go..
You don't even have to speak.. for I already know,
You only have to let me show.. I can take the pain away..
If only for a little while.. keep lonelyness at bey,
sg
steve, 30 may 2019
"Just A Fool"
Do you know how much it hurts inside.. when you turn and walk away..
My heart screams out.. "Please Don't Go".. but the words I just can't say,
I cried a river of tears for you.. a river that overflows..
And I'm washed away in sorrow.. for I don't want you to go,
Life is a lonely illusion.. if there's no one who stands by your side..
And its easy to come to conclusions.. about all the tears that you've cried,
I've got no reason to be here.. if there's no one who cares but me..
And I'm just a fool for putting you.. somewhere you don't want to be,
This heart is so tired and lonely.. I just wanted to be close to you..
To share something special together.. I could take, that would carry me through,
I'm sorry my friend.. I've failed you.. I couldn't convince you to see..
Everything I've tried to show .. comes from love that's inside of me,
I see you as someone so special.. its the reason I feel like I do?
But my heart never stood a chance.. when it came to just loving you.
sg
steve, 30 may 2019
"Through A Vail"
I used to sit around all day.. and dream of what could be..
Then I'd cry myself to sleep.. when I faced reality,
I used to think, that things would change.. just like a "fairy tale"..
I'd walked around with blinders on.. saw the world through a vail,
I believed that someone, somewhere.. was made "just for me"..
But I know now, how wrong I was.. what a fool I came to be,
"True love" isn't something real.. and there is no "ment to be"..
Faity tales are "stories".. that they want us to believe,
Nothing that I know today.. is truly as it seems..
And I can't prove "reality" .. is more real than my "dreams",
So I take each day that comes to me.. expecting nothing more..
For I've let go of any dreams.. that you'd walk through that door.
sg
steve, 30 may 2019
"You'll Never Be"
I waited for you all night long.. for you to come back to me..
But my heart knew all along.. it wasn't ment to be,
Its funny how we've no control.. of what we feel inside..
And though I knew how it would end.. I went just for the ride,
I'd walk a thousand miles for you.. I'd give everything I own..
I'd lay my life down at your feet.. I'd bow before your throne,
To have you say you love me.. to have you care at all..
I'd use every ounce of strength I have.. as I break through every wall,
But some things we can never own.. and you have to just let go..
It doesn't matter how much you love.. it matters what you know,
And I know that I can't have you.. I know you'll never be..
The one I wake up next to.. someone who just loves me,
steve, 16 january 2019
"Only In My Dreams"
I thought I'd gotten over.. anything I felt for you..
I cried those tears out years ago.. I guess you never knew,
It broke my heart in pieces.. when told that "you were gone"..
And I would "never" see your face.. in the early light of dawn,
I cried just like a baby.. wanting only you..
Only time would ease the pain.. in a world that broke in two,
I couldn't help my feelings.. for from the very start..
The first time that I met you.. is when you stole my heart,
I couldn't let you know .. I couldn't say a word..
Until that night you shared with me.. and the embers that were stirred,
The embers turned to flames.. that raged out of control..
And the bare white hot emotions.. burned right threw my soul,
And though you wouldn't know it.. its not always as it seems..
I still see you when I can.. but only in my dreams.
sg
steve, 18 december 2018
"One Last Chance"
It's my last chance to convince you.. that "rainbows aren't just rain"..
And sometimes when we sacrifice.. there's so much more to gain,
Knock down all the walls you built.. and let my heart come in..
Feed to me my hearts desire.. for what its always been,
You still take my breath away.. as you did the day we met..
And the fire still burns beneath my skin.. as does my hearts regret,
I've waited for so long for you.. with hopes you'd someday see..
A friend who's always cared for you.. and what you mean to me,
I just want to look at you.. and tell you what I feel..
Before so much time has passed away.. that I never will,
One last chance to touch you.. before my heart lets go..
One less dream to fly away.. with love I'll never show,
To have you feel what I can't say.. to lay my hands on you..
To show my heart without one word.. is what I need to do,
To look into those deep blue eyes.. that take me far away..
Or dream of what could never be.. as you ask me to stay,
One last chance to cool the flames.. that have raged inside for years..
One last chance to turn the page.. and put an end to tears.
sg
steve, 18 december 2018
"From Me / To You"
I remember when we met.. and right out of the gate...
Before you even said a word, my heart was thinking fate,
I've loved you from that moment, with my heart I love you still...
But I can't make you care for me, I know you never will,
Dreams are all that I have left, to make it through the night...
I sometimes wish we'd never met, so my heart would be alright,
I'd like to put a happy spin, on what I'm trying to say...
But the tears running down my face, keep getting in the way,
Goodbye would be so easy if I weren't in love with you...
To walk away and not look back.. is something I can't do,
Though my love for you is real.. I must hide it far away...
Never to be heard again... nor see the light of day,
If this is what you wish "from me".. your wish is my command...
And everything I'm saying now.. "to you" is my last stand,
I look into your steel blue eyes.. for any change of heart...
But I know exactly where I stand.. and I've known it from the start,
You know how much I love you.. you know I'll always care...
So if you need me... turn around.. for I'm already there.
sg
steve, 18 december 2018
"Never Was"
I wanted only to love you.. as this heart already does..
While I cry myself to sleep.. for things that "never was",
He "never was" in love with you.. he "never was" too blame..
You can't make someone love.. if they don't feel the same,
It "never was" the right time.. as time plays tricks on you..
Yesterday I was twenty one.. today I'm fifty two,
Life was never fair.. and the road was long and hard..
I've had to fight for everything.. and its left me bruised and scarred,
There "never was" a reason.. as to why you shied away..
And there "never was" a time.. that I wished you wouldn't stay,
There "never was" someone.. that I loved more than you..
But you never felt the same.. and that "never was" more true,
Now the years have flown away.. as love eluded me..
Though I searched for many years.. it "never was" to be.
sg
steve, 18 december 2018
"I Could Say"
There's nothing "I could say".. that would change a single thing...
I can't make you fall in love.. and I'm not one to cling,
I could tell you what you mean to me... when I look into your eyes...
Or push it even farther down... behind a masked disguise,
I could tell you how my blood boils.. when your laying by my side...
But never mention the lonely nights.. without you that I've cried,
I could say your skin's like velvet.. and I long to feel your touch...
And I doubt there's anyone alive.. who could make me feel as much,
I could tell you how it feels.. to be burning from within...
As the fires rage out of control.. just beneath my skin,
Or I could say "I don't care".. I could say that "I was high"...
But every single word I spoke.. would be another lie,
Maybe I should walk away.. and never say a thing...
I don't want the broken heart... goodbye always brings.
steve, 26 may 2018
Just Beneath My Skin
You walked into the room last night.. and I could barely breathe..
I couldn't take my eye's off you.. and my mind could not concieve,
That anything more beautiful.. in this world might exist..
As my eye's caressed all of you.. there was nothing that was missed,
I don't remember what was said.. as my world, dissolved away..
You were all that I could see.. beyond you, only gray,
I couldn't bring my words to mouth.. and I couldn't let it show..
The inferno that consumed me.. was not in my control,
I had to walk away from you.. my thoughts were not my own..
My heart was in complete control.. and you were not alone,
With bated breath and heavy heart.. I tore myself away..
Wanting nothing more than you.. I kept my tears at bey,
There's no good reason.. to let you know, what I feel for you..
It wouldn't change a single thing.. and I wouldn't want it to,
I'll always see you with my heart.. the way I saw you then..
And always will the fires burn.. "just beneath my skin".
sg
Latest comments:
16 may 2024
violetta
Może w lipcu będę miała takie wakacje:)
16 may 2024
jeśli tylko
słońce w płynie..
15 may 2024
Weronika
Za jeszcze jeden rejs!
14 may 2024
Mam takie oko :)
14 may 2024
Jaga
Zwierzęta upodobniły się do koloru otoczenia
14 may 2024
To naturalny suchy i pustynny klimat. I tam są
14 may 2024
Klimat taki, że nie był i raczej nie będzie,
12 may 2024
Melancthe
Kajzerki są przereklamowane ;)
11 may 2024
kb
wielki wypas - był albo może będzie. kto wie...
11 may 2024
sama prawda z tym myśleniem i psoceniem ale
11 may 2024
zastanowiło mnie czy owe cenienie kajzerek wynika
11 may 2024
skomponowane kolorystycznie..
18 may 2024
Satish Verma
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wiesiek
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Satish Verma
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Satish Verma
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wiesiek
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Jaga
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Satish Verma
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Satish Verma
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Satish Verma
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Satish Verma