it's complicated

I've never known how to live without you
I probably never will

There's hardly any hope
I was always a bad student of life
I failed my degree in learning by mistakes
Here comes the time to admit that
I can't live with you either

Every time you appear back
Everything gets so complicated especially poetry
Nothing is as it was especially poetry
It feels so wrong to say
I like it but I can't find myself in it
Fighting it seems to be the only right I can do

I assume it'd be easier to happen
If I was clear  which one of us I am fighting
Cause I'm sure since ever
I'd rather beat a devil than win with myself