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Poezja

Faith Capps
PROFIL O autorze Poezja (1)

dodane wcześniej pozostałe wiersze dodane później

22 marca 2012

Choose

I was positive
When I made my choice
Your different
Than most other boys
But then he came along
He twisted my emotions
My brains one giant commotion
Why must I choose
Between him and you
Why is love so hard to explain
When I chose you
You were the right choice
But now Im not sure anymore
He makes me laugh
You make me cry
At night
I just want to die
Dont make me choose
I cant take it
Why dont you just take my heart
And break it
I cant stand
To let either of you lose
But the time has come
And I have to choose
Fine
You make life pain
And cold like rain
I will tell you
Who I choose

I choose
To walk away
Into fields of grey
Away from the both of you
All because
You broke my heart
And made me choose


liczba komentarzy: 1 | punkty: 25 |  więcej 

Jock Engelman,  

wow! so much emotion thrown into these words... i hope that you dont mind if i analyse it from an analytical point of view do you..? so the begining of this starts with a happy person, gender unknown, then we question whether this person is the subject matter, because another person is introduced, this one we know is a male, but based upon social standards we assume that the initial subject is female, we dont assume prejudice, but then we find out that another male is introduced, and one is the manipulator, and one is the true love, we assume that the female is currently in a relationship with the manipulator, she is presented with a decision, she is unable to decide because they both hold qualities she loves. through the use of emotive language such as "My brains one giant commotion, Why must I choose..." this shows that the emotions are vague and unknown to us and to her, this is well done as it enables even the general public to sympathise to the point of even showing empathy... we expect that it would be a simple choice but we expect that she will sort it out... the poem for almost up to half of the text that there is no rhyming scheme... through the use of juxtposition of "he make me laugh... you make me cry..." shows us that she is showing regret... the way that you have separated the remaining 7 lines into a second stanza shows that it is more significant, or at least needs to appear more significant... the use of short consicse words and sentences, allows the reader and the audience to become totally apart of the emotions, which are tearing the girl from the inside out "...all because, you broke my heart, and made me choose..." is the final thoughts of the audience, leaving them to think.... i hope that helps with your future writting and i hope that it shows you that people actually read your works and how they do or do not understand it... feel free to analyse my works, even the painful stuff.... :D

zgłoś |


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