6 february 2012

Confusedly Undecided

I've
been trying to conceal
what
my heart truly feels
behind
this wall of pretentions
which
control all my actions
 
When
you turned away you didn't hear me mumble
those
words that took part of my preamble
caught
up in this feeling of disdain
the
tears I shed were hidden by the heavy rain
 
Fed
up with all this misery
now
my hopes are swiftly flown away
far
away that no one can reach
even
a voice with the highest pitch
 
Why
did i gamble my heart?
even
though I know you can break it apart,
call
me blind, call me selfish,
despite
it all my love for you will never perish.
 
But,
should it be you?
the
one that i have to let go,
or
should it be him?
in
oblivion, be buried like an evanescent beam...
 


number of comments: 11 | rating: 11 |  more 

Dany,  

You have asked for friendship. It does not reject friendship < friendly >. I do not know I english. Through dictionary translating, I tested (try) to apprehend your poem, but strange things leave (go out) me So, I apologize, but I fail to read your poems, I do not understand they (their).

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Ailill,  

I liked how this flowed... the feelings expressed.. etc.. I guess, if I was doing this.. I might not end it the same way.. as a reader, the ending kind of trailed off for me.. but overall, it was an engaging read..

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Zabdiy Yoav,  

@dany: It's okay Dany I understand. :) I am also using the online translator to somehow understand your language because I want to read several poems posted in this website.

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Zabdiy Yoav,  

@Ailill: thank you for liking my poem. :) I'm so glad that some people like what I wrote. I would be happy to get some advises, suggestions or tips from all of you about writing beautiful and inspirational poems. ",

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kipruto muthemba,  

"weighty words, simple true emotions captured on paper".. loving this piece..

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Zabdiy Yoav,  

thank u so much for your comment Kipruto Muthemba :) :) :) it's motivating...

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Zabdiy Yoav,  

Thank you Johny :)

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Zabdiy Yoav,  

Thank you Johny :)

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Johny Gmatrix,  

one of my poems: "[ "fiery sword" // towards the sky // he lifted his eyes // expecting dawning hopes // towards the sky // he spread shoulders out // to glide wanted // with the wind in expanses // in the hand sharp sword // like the razor // on the head steel blue helmet // at the side woman at one time // he shed blood for her // obstinacy in the mind of damage // on the road red white // there is no retreat // he took an oath // nobody will stop // to stop the death // ]" .... translated and well written? modest

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Zabdiy Yoav,  

the poem of yours Johny is nice. :)

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