Elton Camp, 2 february 2012
By Elton Camp
The Democrats know exactly who their man will be
Although what the Republicans will do remains to see
But a simple fact that both them may well need to face
Neither of them has put the best possible one in the race
There is one who has known both poverty and riches
And what can come to one who gets in and pitches
And to all types of people this one is able to relate
And few, if any, hold any prejudice of any hate
This candidate is a person neither too young or old
And makes own decisions, not doing as is told
Another qualification is a history of job creation
That has helped many people throughout the nation
Not a single hint of scandal has there ever been
Though the press has watched since way back when
The original mate has never, ever been dumped
So that someone younger then can be humped
This person’s intelligence is extremely high
Giving judgment as to the right things to try
Foreign heads of countries absolutely wouldn’t dare
To try to deceive one who is proven honest and fair
The image of the USA would dramatically rise
If this person should gain the presidential prize
And just who is this fabulous person you say?
Just take a close look down Tennessee way
There is one who has well earned her fame
Find out that Miss Dolly Parton is her name
(I’m pretty sure she isn’t interested in being president, but she’s a person I honestly admire. As she says, she isn’t blonde and she isn’t dumb.)
Elton Camp, 1 february 2012
By Elton Camp
Most car recalls are not a big deal
We’re still safe behind the wheel
Even food recalls are usually okay
If the food was cooked the right way
But it really comes as quite a whack
If they want your pacemaker back
Likewise, if it’s your artificial joint
That to a defect they should point
Now the latest recall that I do hear
Errors in birth control pills they fear
So if you took the pills like they say,
May learn you’re pregnant one day
They admit the pills made the wrong way
Were distributed throughout the U.S.A.
I wonder if Pfizer will take the baby too
Or exactly what it is they propose to do
Elton Camp, 1 february 2012
Each to His Own Taste
By Elton Camp
For eating raw meat I surely don’t care
But I have some friends who order it rare
There are some who simply adore pate
I refuse to eat food produced that way
To many, sushi is a gourmet’s delight
But I can hardly abide it within my sight
Way over in China, it’s dogs that they eat
And some greedily devour chicken feet
Some folks taste runs to eating of veal
I find a cow’s little calf too hard to steal
Others, over chitlins, will just have a fit
I can’t eat something that smells like shit
Pickled hog feet I often see in the store
That’s another that I absolutely abhor
The meat market sells pig’s tails and ears
That I’d vomit, suh fare bring on fears
And I hear there are people who eat rat
And even skin and cook a fleabag cat
“Each to his own taste,” the man did vow
As he tenderly kissed his old milk cow
Elton Camp, 1 february 2012
Going Shopping With the Wife
By Elton Camp
There’s nothing like going to the mall
Oh my, how much longer can she stall
How many more dresses can she try on
And how much longer can she be gone
Husbands gather at the food court & sit
It won’t do a bit of good to have a fit
After an outfit the wife does choose
She must have matching purse & shoes
And then the husband must assume
She’s selecting a new brand of perfume
Then she’ll stay at the cosmetics a while
To her spouse, it is such a tiresome trial
What he needed he bought right away
It surely didn’t take him half the day
When she goes to the bathroom, no doubt
It will never be like him: quick in and out
When the shopping ordeal is finally through
It’s a day spent in a way the hubby does rue
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