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24 december 2011

Alone (mountain Top)

Some times i wondre wats there for me. I know im getting my blessing but still feel alone. A college student, a bright future, a good heart, im smart ,warm hearted ,funny ect...... and the list goes on. I dont know if the fact im leaving is bothering me or the fact im alone. My aunt says im not alone or i always have someone. Yea family but family can come and go you kno. When it comes down to love i mean love love as in loving someone i always let it go. No not as n im breaking up with you lettin go. But the i want to try with you love.Everytime a female comes up and tries to talk to me. I push her away only because i dont want to be hurt. Most seem to not understand and think im bein difficult. nooo im just misunderstood and your not reading me right. Thats the first thing a female says is they are afraid of getting hurt that is one of the biggest fear. Why are you so different from others?? this girl says. I hunched my shoulders and she smiles. Because you are you and no one else. You are your own person your own personality. Theres not a day i dont see you not smiling and a day i dont see u laughing. Of course i cut her off for a sec and i said I smile to keep from crying, i laugh to keep from screaming. I am real beacuse my life is fake. I have a good personality because i seen bad ones. All in All i am me completely becasue i felt destruction.If i didnt go through so much i wouldnt be the good person i am. Strong they say and the hopeful of the hopeless. Mommies Angel her path to light Dad's Dream same thoughts and the continuing. I am the top of the mountain my young sisters climb and look up to. But on top of that mountain i am alone.*how to love*




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