11 january 2013

Think/Feel

To live life unaware of time and its actions is hard so
As I sit here on this stair way watching cars go by and people giving me awkward stares I think about the time when I was one of them,
Judging a homeless person saying it’s his fault he’s in that predicament, and how he shouldn’t have done what he did.
Then my heart drops I start to feel a headache coming thinking of how I was then and if I’ve changed sense,
Still sitting here I’ve wondered about my out of control habits, and destructive ways I start to feel like my chances are being numbered,
Then I think about my mother and how it would hurt her to see her baby on the streets,
my heart starts getting heavy thinking of her voice and having enough food to eat,
I wondered if I should’ve stayed with her instead of this person who I thought was a friend,
I began to cry holding my hands over my eyes while these people stroll right on by,
I thought about the time when my friend and I went for a walk  they decided to kick this homeless person in the chin,
I wondered could this be my punishment for not stopping them,
I’ve gained just enough strength to get up after this little girl did the same,
then I started to think life sure has a way of making you pay for the decisions you’ve made,
I then started to smile realizing that I gave up half of my life for judging a homeless person and how he might have not known that he would be in that position,
I began to pray and think him for opening my eyes because he helped me realize that just because someone’s homeless doesn’t mean it’s on purpose,
This man decided to approach me as I sat on the bench near the highway,
He asked if he could have a set then he said, "you look so familiar to me",
I asked who he was; he said, "I was waiting for an opportunity to tell you how you’ve helped me by not stopping that person who kicked me in my chin way back when you all were walking,"
How could you’ve remember that far back I only remember parts of that,
He said, "I think about it every day know I get a chance to say I forgive you and them,
I’m now married with 3 kids and a job I’m able to keep; I’m happy"
I started feeling embarrassed all I could do is sit there holding back another batch of tears while i apologized,
He said, "don’t you can’t change what happened,"
As he walked away he said, "Just remember one thing just because you’re homeless doesn’t mean that your hopeless get up and start again your life is still going."




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