Diary

Anorexia is a very serious issue. It is not something that can be changed overnight. It is not a switch that can be flipped on an off. It is a SERIOUS problem in this world that is not being fixed. It is a condition that is only frowned upon because it is "unhealthy," "low," and "demented." Well guess what? It's a freaking way of life for some of us. It's a way to cope with all of this shit in this world. Just like self-harm, it can be a way to silently tell the world that they're not the only ones who can hurt us. Any form of self-harm is a serious matter that cannot be taken lightly. You wouldn't tell a blind man to just see would you? You wouldn't tell a lame man to just walk. You wouldn't tell a deaf man to just hear. You wouldn't tell someone with cancer to just get over it. You wouldn't freaking tell a dying man to just live. So why the hell would you tell someone with an eating disorder to just eat. Or someone who has a cutting addiction to just stop cutting. Or someone who is an alcoholic to just stop drinking. Or someone who is a drug addict to just stop doing drugs. There is so much more to all of these things that what the world see. These people are HURTING and this is their way of coping. Of silently voicing their pain. They are silently screaming for someone to help them. But because people nowadays judge and enjoy pointing out everyone's flaws just to make themselves feel better, people hide their hurt and pain. Because they feel like no one cares and no one ever will. People don't do these things to themselves just to do it. They do it because they are hurting. They feel alone. They feel worthless less than nothing. They feel unimportant. This is the only way they know how to cope. By hurting themselves. They feel like they have to punish themselves or they just can't feel anything and they hurt themselves just to be able to feel something even if it's for a few seconds. Or the pain is just so much that they are trying to take their mind off of that pain or numb it. We live in a world where image is everything. That's why people hide their pain. The thing is that everyone is hurting and they are silently voicing their pain. Just because someone doesn't cut, doesn't mean that they aren't hurting. Everyone's way of voicing their pain is different. The girl to your left could be starving herself because she doesn't feel pretty enough or because she is being bullied while the boy to your right could be cutting himself to help release some of the pain that he bottles up inside. But you would never know because they hide it so well or maybe you're just so caught up in your own life that you don't care about the well-being of others. They're not a part of your life, therefor they're not important enough to try and help. "Imperfections," as the world calls them, are frowned upon. Girls cake on makeup on themselves so they can look the way the world believes is "beautiful." Well guess what? There is no "right" way to look beautiful. Beauty on the outside is temporary. The beauty on the inside is what lasts forever. People wonder why the suicide rate goes up every year. Let's see. What's going on in the world? Bullying, magazines making it seem like you have to dress a certain way to look beautiful, celebrities and TV shows making it seem that you have to live a certain way to be successful, high schoolers/ college students making what social class you are a part of make who you'll become. "You're overweight," means you're not pretty. "You don't wear makeup," means you're ugly. "You don't wear designer clothes or shoes and don't carry expensive bags," means you're not worthy to hang with us. Some people can't help how much they weigh. Some people can't use makeup for medical reasons. Some people can't afford all the luxuries in life and can barely afford the basic essentials like food, a roof over their head, or water, and yet people are judged so much by these things, and that is the reason why the world is so corrupt today. Because we judge so much by appearance. We value objects more than people. "Nowadays people know the price of everything and the value of nothing." -Oscar Wilde. We put what a person had above who they are as a person. What if someone just came up to you and basically said that you're worthless to your face? How would you feel? Most of you reading this would feel worthless. Why would you tell someone they aren't good enough? Not pretty enough? Not smart enough? All of this because that person is different. Well who cares if they are different. We're humans not clones. Haven't you noticed that the people who are the most successful have success BECAUSE THEY ARE DIFFERENT. Being different is how you get noticed and it makes you stand out. They are also the people who don't care much for what people say about them. You may not be able to stop people from giving you hate, but you can stop caring. But unfortunately it takes strength that most people don't have any more because they use their strength to hide their pain. Who cares if they don't have all the luxuries you have. You have food, clothes, a home, and a bed. That alone makes you richer than 75 if the world. So quit making fun of them and putting them down because they don't wear Neiman Marcus or have the new Juicy Couture bag. They have food, a roof, clothes and a bed. They have what they need to survive and that is more than what most of the world has. You judge so much by looks that you don't notice what your words and actions do. Putting people down has more of an effect than you think. So never call a guy ugly or tell a girl she isn't beautiful for any reason. Not even as a joke. Because words hurt and can cut deep as a knife. I don't say these things just because I've observed them. I know what it's like to feel worthless. I was bullied from preschool 'til graduation in 12th grade. 13 years. I was anorexic for 7 years. I had a cutting addiction for 4 years. I know what it's like. So don't tell me that I don't know what I'm talking about out. Watch your words because they can kill. In the words of Confucius, "Everything has beauty, but not everyone can see it. "