Bunny Crunch


Boarding School


That one night when I got lost
Made two months of high emotional cost
When first I saw you, I started to reel
Fearing suddenly the sound of pavement against wheel
Your incoordination
Skewed and arced your destination
And without much of a sound
Your longboard knocked me to the ground
It struck me thrice
And I fell twice
Once to the ground
And once for the sweet sound
Of your voice and your facaded care
We were the tortoise and the hare
I told you that we hit it off
I could hear not nature’s awkward cough
I wish that a light in my mind you’d knocked on
‘Ere that smile on my face began to spawn
Though my shin then stung like sleet
I thought you were very sweet
I couldn't walk
So to you I tried to talk
About my great stress
And you began my back to caress
You gave me a hug
Though I'd really caught a bug
You held me in your arms for twenty minutes straight
And I thought you were so, so great
You talked to me gently
Though you hit me like a Bentley
Taking the pain
Though I sounded insane
Your gentle grip was far too soft
And facaded was your loft
When you helped me to a nearby bench
I had fallen through your trench
You told me you felt awful
And though it was unlawful
You thought the distance to help was a little too far
And I almost accepted a ride in your car
Even when you lost your keys
Because you stayed my trust you could seize
You slowly half-carried me back to your room
Though it was really to my tomb
Of me you tried to take great care
The only time you were truly fair
You made sure I felt safe
And because of your kindness, you for a moment were my chief
When you left for a moment, I spoke of you highly
Insisting that you were ever so knightly
And you amazed me, for I thought in your heart
There room and care was enough for a stranger in part
That night I left the hospital delighted
But alas, come to find, I had only been slighted
For last night of a sudden you wrote to me
Saying you've never been my boyfriend and would never want to be
When I'd said nothing of the sort
You'd mangled that ball right into my court
You said you hoped that I would see
While you had been ignoring me
When I said simple things like “How was your day?”
Apparently I'd gotten far in your way
To tell them you were my boyfriend, which had crossed never my mind
You said was no right of mine of any kind
Of the First Amendment you must surely have heard
It's far kinder than you and your every last word
You can go to hell
For treating me so well
For holding me close and rubbing my back
Then telling me to you I'm less important than an empty sack
Like pool, you've really got some balls
To be making all these awful calls
Into my life your punitive claim barges
When I had pressed on you no charges
I had done you a favor
And my forgiveness you don't savor
All you wish to do is accuse me of lies
And with my blood that you caused stain the sanguine skies
Take it from the horse’s mouth, not the donkey’s hole
I'd be better off strapped to a silver pole
Than tolerate your lies
As kindness in disguise
You are no man
So your presence from my life I must ban
A broken heart is a heart nonetheless
And a heart is far more than you have, I guess
If only I could kick your ass
For trying these rumors as truth about me to pass
If you were a buck
My heart strings you'd still pluck
But I'd have a chance that trigger to pull
Have a chance to charge you like a bull
I still wouldn't take it, for I know from you
Just what a few hurtful words can do
They can destroy
Turn a man to a boy
If only you had ever grown up
‘Cause damn, you started cute as a pup
You started as security
Now you're a mere impurity
A virus that will kill
A large hospital bill
You have no room to care about a stranger or soul
For with love for yourself your heart is full
But mine with the rest of your victims I'll share
I'll keep them safe from the horrors of this hare



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