20 december 2011

love

I would not be surprized
if a fractional percent
of people with depression
are clinically depressed
the rest of us know better
it is a process of clarification
unavoidable world
the absurdity
the compromise
the conditioning
tooth and claw
in expensive threads
the unattainable surrender
to love
and dental records
*
I picketted our wedding
I protested our predictable
future
that routine that would steal the day
away from us
*
the first trick
is to love without loving
to not desire
what isn't there
or what is
which never lasts
*
I imagine my plurality
the finest moments I live
are alone in the weather
with animals and trees
we are out there all of us
alone
momentarily relieved
*
man is not wolf to man
man is man to man
wolves treat each other
much better
*
I love you too much to wish
myself on you
and vice versa
*
hanging on by a thread
is what spiders do
not people
people panic or grow desperate
in the chains they make
*
we tell ourselves we'll blow our
brains out
or do it in a more delicate manner
after payday
*
killing is killing
ritual or not
training or not
if you can kill yourself
you must have killed already
again and again
while making your plans
if only it were legal
like poverty
like a right you were born with
*
many people explained me to myself
I bought their books
and read them
it became a pasttime
*
even my anger is half baked
it strives for wrath
but is ultimately faked
*
to say it doesn't matter
about any or all human events
is to be situated far from apathy
*
 




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